Juz as wad quzhao said to me: dis earthquake scence would become an uneraseable part of my memories.. this thing helped me to noe wad r the most important ppl in my life.. as i was realli getting into troubles in such a horrible thing which coule be related to my life, i began to understand how important he was for me..
Right after i went downstairs and got to cry, i suddenly felt have to contact somebldy else.. the first person i thought abt was anna.. she asked me which one is more importand between friends and relatives, i answered "relatives".. but now think the true thoughts of mine can be clearly shown when realli getting into a right scence.. I was very worried abt her coz i noe she always went bed very early, i tried to call her many times but she switched off her handphone.. den, i smsed her handphone and hoped nothing would happen in her living area..
De second person i tried to contact was my dear father.. he was sleeping at home at dat time.. my mum tried to stop me from doing tt but i finalli did.. dey adults always said have to concern more abt others, if u got into troubles, cannot contact ur nearest relatieves soon, just coz afraid de news would scare de ppl u love most.. but i realli cannot force myself to accept dis.. i had to report my nearest relatieves wad thing i was getting in right after i feel scared, dats wad i think may be right.. I cried to my dad through the handphone, i noe well dat he was totalli scared when heard my words.. hahax sorry eh dad, i feel reali sorry abt my selfishness now..
Then here comes the most important part of my story.. The third person i was thinking abt was him.. den i did a very brave thing which i began to realise how stupid and wrong i was.. i told myself tt have to control my inert feelings, so i did not call him but sms him a very short sms.. "earthquake.. take care.." just short like tt.. i noe it's not good to do dis but at dat urgent time, the only thing i was thinking abt was his safty.. i hoped to let him noe how much i love him and how much i concern abt his life.. I knew i was supposed to control myself from doing dose kinda mad things, but at dat time, dat scence, i realli dunno wad will happen follow the small earthquake.. another earthquake or sunami? I was realli scared to leave dis world so soon.. I had not tell him abt my real feeling toward him, i had not even let him to noe my existance.. i felt so scared and suddenly felt nothing but just a feeling tt i had to tell him how much i love him if it was realli de last day of my life.. so i smsed him.. yep i did..
But.. I was totalli cheated.. the time i noe the fact from de gal hu recieved dose two smses i sent to HIM, i felt suddenly drown deeply into de sea.. I neva wanna blame kokjun.. he did nothing wrong, i noe it well tt he had tried his best to help me.. but hu noes wad the god was trying to play abt? so, hu can tell me wad i was supposed to do? smile or cry?
shiny blogged on 11:58 PM
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